How To Be a Better Person: 101 Ways
“We cannot become what we need to be, remaining what we are.” - Max Depree
- Commit yourself to growth (Be Growth-oriented). The more you grow, the better you become.
- Work on your negative traits. Are there any traits
you dislike about yourself? Some traits which I didn’t like about myself
in the past include being self-centered, arrogance, selfishness,
critical, harshness, hardness, etc. Identify them, then work on them one
at a go. It can be challenging to try to overhaul your character at one
go. On the other hand, if you work on addressing 1 negative trait at a
time, it’s a lot more manageable and achievable.
- Identify your ideal persona. What’s your ideal self
like? Picture him/her in your mind, then write down all the traits of
your ideal persona. Then, start living true to your ideal self.
- Find a role model. Having a role model gives us a
concrete image of who we want to become. I see role models in people
like Ellen Degeneres (for her genuineness and compassion towards
others), Tyra Banks (for not being afraid to stand up for what she
believes in, and inspiring women to do the same), Ivanka Trump (for her
beauty, intellect and grace – representing the modern day woman), Oprah
(for being a power mover in the world of self-help), among others. Who
is/are your role model(s), and what do you like about them?
- Be a role model. The best way to be a better person
is to be a role model to others. How can you be an inspirational guide
to others? Live by example. In being a role model, remember it’s not
about making yourself into someone you’re not (see #57 on Be
Individualistic). It’s about living true to your ideal self (see #3).
- Be a better child to your parents. You only have 2
parents in your life, so appreciate the time you have with them. If your
relationship with your parents is non-ideal, it doesn’t mean that
everything ends here.
- Be a better friend to your friends. I used to be
disappointed at how some of my friends aren’t always there for me when I
need them, then I realized that I should think about how I can be a better friend
to my friends first before making such expectations of others. Likewise
for you, think: How can you be a better friend to your friends? Read: How To Have More Best Friends in Life
- Be a better sibling, if you have siblings. I’ve
several friends who are the only-child, and they frequently talk about
how they wish they had a brother or sister. If you’re lucky enough to
have brother(s) and sister(s), treasure them. Spend more time with them;
Show them care and concern; Look out for them if you need to.
- Be a better partner, if you’re attached. If you’ve a
girlfriend/wife or boyfriend/husband, think about how you can be a
better partner to him/her. When you’re in a relationship, it’s easy to
make demands and expectations about what your partner should do/be, but
it’s difficult to take ownership for the things we aren’t doing/being
ourselves. Commit yourself to being a better partner, and release your
expectations of your partner. Both of you will be happier that way.
- Be a better parent, if you have children. Many
parents have told me that having a child one of the most amazing things
that has ever happened to them. If you have a child(ren), think about
how you can be a better parent, without impeding on the child’s growth.
Raising a child can be challenging especially as he/she enters
adolescence years, but that’s also part of the joy of being a parent.
- Be a better employee in your company (if you work
for someone). Often times, I hear people complain about how their
companies are not giving them enough benefits/wages/support/etc. While
this may be true, think about how you can be a better employee instead.
Check if there’s anything more you can do for your manager. See if there
are any new projects you can take on. See how you can improve your
current performance.
- Be a better manager/leader (if you’re managing
others). Many people leave their jobs because they’re unhappy with their
managers. How well you manage your employees can dramatically affect
their motivation levels and their performance. Put their needs before
yours and bring the best out of them.
- Be a better member of your community. What
communities are you a part of? Say, interest groups? Recreational clubs?
How can you be a more active part of the communities?
- Be a better human to others. How can you treat the fellow humans around you better? Start treating them this way.
- Be a better being in this world. How can you make the world a better place? Start doing that today.
- Be Able. Equip yourself with skills. Your skills
are like the tools in your toolbox. The more skills you have, the more
able you become.
- Learn something new. There are always new things to learn, no matter how much you already know. The more you learn, the better you become. Read: Skills Development
- Hone your current skills. With your current skills,
strengthen them. You can never be too good at a skill – there’s always
room to improve. Even the best people in their fields, such as Tiger
Woods (Golf), Michael Jordan (Basketball), Beethoven (Pianist) never
stopped honing their craft. Read: Leveling Up
- Be Accepting of differences – be it different
people, different thinking, different lifestyles, different
cultures. For they add variety and color into our lives. If everyone is
the same, life will be bland – monotonous, even.
- Be Adaptable / Flexible / Versatile. Have your
goals and plans, but be able to change them accordingly when the
situation calls for it. Rigidity is a sign of weakness, while
adaptability makes you so much more powerful.
- Be Adventurous.
- Step out of your comfort zone. Are you sticking to
the same routines and hiding behind a safety net? Step out and do
something you’ve never done before. It’ll broaden your mind and make you
a better person.
- Travel. Traveling broadens perspectives and widens horizons. Since June 2011, I’ve been touring the world, starting with Europe and
I’m gaining so many insights about different cultures that it’s
amazing. The trip has definitely enriched my perspective on the world.
- Be Altruistic.
- Always have the best intentions for others. Go for the highest good in everything you do, every decision you make, every path you take, every thought you have.
- Volunteer (for a cause you believe in). Not
everything has to be measured in money. At PE, I spend hours every day
writing the best content and giving it away for free, without asking
anything back in return from the readers. With volunteer work, you may
be giving your labor for free, but this is time spent in good stead.
Don’t underestimate the kind of difference you can make in others’ lives
with just a few hours of work.
- Save the environment. Our world is being wasted
away, day after day, with the harm the society at large is inflicting on
it. What can you do to protect our home?
- Be Assertive. Stand up for your rights and things you believe in.
- Be Attentive. When someone is talking, give him/her
your full attention. Don’t busy yourself with something else; that’s
just rude and inconsiderate.
- Be Bold. Life is an adventure – don’t live it in fear. Boldly pursue your dreams. Boldly act on your instincts. Boldly create the life you’ve always wanted. Read: How To Overcome Fear and Pursue Your Dreams
- Be Candid. Be frank, be outspoken, be earnest. Say
what’s on your mind – Don’t feel the need to censor your words because
you’re afraid of what others think. Be true to yourself. (But not at the
expense of others’ feelings, of course – See #39 on Be Empathetic.)
- Be Caring.
- Show concern. There’s no need to wait for a cry for
help before showing your care and concern. You can do it right away,
right now, to those around you. Even if there’s nothing wrong, it’ll
warm the hearts of others to know that you cared.
- Call your friends. Are there any friends you’ve not
contacted for a while? Call them today and check on how they’re doing.
They may not show it, but they’ll be happy that you called – because it
showed you cared.
- Be Coachable. There’s always something we can learn
from everyone, no matter his/her age, background or area of expertise.
Don’t close off on opportunities to learn just because you think you
know enough. Open your mind and let every encounter be a learning
lesson. The moment you close yourself off is the point where you stop
learning.
- Find a mentor. A mentor guides you to become
greater than you can be by yourself. You should only get a mentor if (a)
the person has something to teach you (b) your personalities gel with
each other. Back when I was working in P&G, I had informal mentors
who often stepped in to make sure I was doing well. At the same time,
they themselves had mentors who guided them. No matter how senior or
experienced you may be, there’s always someone who has something to
teach you.
- Be Committed… to your goals and dreams. If you’ve
set a goal, go all out and achieve it. If you’ve laid down a plan, stick
to it all through the way. Don’t waver, for that’s not in you to do so.
- Be Compassionate / Kind. Always look out for
opportunities where you can help others. Don’t get caught up in your own
space – instead, look outwards and see if there’s anything you can do
for others. Even the simplest things, like helping someone carry his/her
belongings, is very much appreciated by others.
- Be Confident… in who you are and what you do. There’s no reason not to be. Read: How To Be The Most Confident Person in the World
- Be Conscientious / Meticulous. Are you attentive to
everything you do? Such a quality is rare, but so precious.
Conscientious people put their heart and soul to what they do;
consequently they do a complete and thorough job in whatever they do.
You’ll naturally be a valuable asset to whichever organization or team
you’re a part of.
- Be Considerate / Thoughtful. Make a habit to
consider others in your decisions and actions, for they affect other
people. Make sure no one is negatively affected before you proceed with
your plans.
- Practice the Golden Rule. It’s the ethic of
reciprocity, which states “One should treat others as one would like
others to treat oneself”. How do you want others to treat you? Shower
others with this behavior, and you’ll attract more of the same.
- Practice the Silver Rule. Related to the Golden
Rule, it states “Do not do unto others what you would not have them do
unto you”. It’s to make up for the shortcomings of the Golden Rule. How
do you not want others to treat you? Make sure you don’t do this to others.
- Be Cooperative. Don’t be insular and seclusive. Be
willing to work with others if they need your help. We do not exist in
this world alone; Life is possible because we have each other.
- Be Courteous. Practice good etiquette. Always remember your “hi”s, “bye”s, “thank you”s and “welcome”s.
- Be Courageous / Overcome Fear.
Is there anything you’re scared of? Don’t be. Fear is mental – It’s
only what you perceive it to be. If you challenge that which you’re
afraid of, you’ll realize there’s nothing to be scared of at all,
because there is nothing to lose – We entered this world with nothing
but our consciousness, we’ll leave the world with the same consciousness. Read: How to Overcome Fear and Pursue Your Dreams | How To Overcome Fear(Series)
- Be Curious.
- Have an insatiable thirst for knowledge. So you’ll always be learning new things.
- Ask questions – often. The more questions you ask, the more information you can uncover.
- Get feedback from others. Feedback is one of the fastest ways to identify areas of improvement, since others can see our blind spots. Day 13 of 30DLBL is about asking for feedback from others around us so we can improve.
- Be Dependable. Be there for others when they need
you. Always check if there’s anything you can do for your friends. If
they call you, make time out for them. If they email you, take the time
to respond. You never know when it’s someone in pain and reaching out
for help. Read: How To Have More Best Friends in Life
- Be Discerning. Don’t blindly accept everything you
hear or read; Always evaluate what you’re given with a discerning mind.
This doesn’t mean you become skeptical; but rather you exercise your
judgment appropriately.
- Be Emotionally Generous. Emotional stinginess means
to be stingy with your emotions, while emotional generosity is to be
generous. So, an emotionally stingy person is typically negative, unhappy, critical,
judging, imposing; while an emotionally generous person is positive,
happy, encouraging, supportive, etc. Be as giving with your emotions as
possible. Encourage others. Be positive. Share happiness. Read: Are You Emotionally Generous?
- Compliment others (with genuine intent). Part of
emotional generosity is to be generous with compliments (that’s genuine
and not fake). Get into the habit of giving compliments. When you meet
someone and if you recognize something nice about him/her, let him/her
know. You’ll make his/her day.
- Be Empathetic. Empathy is the key to successful
relationships. Learn to see things from others’ perspective. It’ll let
you understand people better, resolve conflicts, and develop meaningful
connections.
- Be Encouraging. No one likes a wet blanket. Be
encouraging when your friends share their problems with you. Be
supportive when they tell you about their goals.
- Be Enthusiastic. Life is too beautiful to live
dread and boredom. Embrace every day with joy and love. Start every day
on a fresh new start! Approach every situation with excitement! And
bring this energy to everything you do and everyone you meet.
- Aim for Excellence.
- Take on more than you can handle. If you’re
managing your responsibilities fine at the moment, challenge yourself by
taking on more. If you’re always doing the same things, you’ll never
develop anything. You’ll no sooner atrophy in your growth. Take on more
work. Push your boundaries. Stretch yourself. This way you increase your
capacity.
- Expect nothing less than the best. Hold yourself to
the highest standard in whatever you do. Always aim for the highest
goals, the best results, the grandest vision.
- Live your life to the fullest. Because why should you settle for a life that’s anything less? Read: 101 Ways To Live Your Life To The Fullest
- Be Fair.
- Don’t bad mouth other people. Don’t speak ill of
people behind their back, because it’s unfair to them and doesn’t give
them a chance to defend themselves. Let the person know if you don’t
like something he/she did, or otherwise make peace with it within
yourself.
- Don’t discriminate. Give equal treatment to
everyone, regardless of race, language, religion, nationality, gender,
age, social status, financial status.
- Don’t judge. Don’t make conclusions about others’
character of their life based on 1-2 things you see about them. Always
give others the benefit of the doubt.
- Uphold justice. If you see unfairness being
exacted, step in to right the wrong. This includes intervening when
someone is being bullied, or standing up for someone when he/she is
being unfairly judged.
- Have Faith. Don’t put too much pressure on an event
or a person to give you the results you seek. Do your best within your
capacity, and have faith that everything will fall into place.
- Be Filial. Our parents have dedicated half of their
lives to having us and raising us. Now that we’re grown up, it’s our
turn to repay them for the life they have given us. If your relationship
with your parents is not the ideal state you envision, be sure to read How To Improve Your Relationship With Your Parents (Series)
- Be a Follower. Aristotle said it best with this quote: ”He who cannot be a good follower cannot be a good leader.”
Are you a good follower? Are you able to take directions from others?
Are you willing to take directions from others? Before you think about
becoming a leader (see #60), you’ve to learn to be a good follower
first.
- Be Forgiving.
- Let go of your anger. Is there anything or anyone you’re angry with? Perhaps it’s time to give it/him/her and let things go.
- Bury the hatchet with someone. Beyond embracing
forgiveness inside you, reach out to the person you had grievances with
in the past. This is not going to be easy, but it’ll bring you a huge
step forward in your growth. When I was younger, I had some conflicts
with schoolmates here and there, due to misunderstandings. After I
started PE, I decided I had to live by example if I was to pursue my purpose
to help others how to achieve their highest potential. So, I
reconnected with old schoolmates whom I had conflicts with. It was much
easier than I thought – most of them reciprocated in kind, and after
that we stayed connected as friends. Read: 30BBM Day 24 – Right a Past Wrong
- Be Friendly / Approachable. We are all humans, here
to connect with one another. If you see someone you don’t know, take
the first step to know him/her. With people you know, keep yourself
accessible so they can approach you whenever they need help. Read: 10 Tips To Make New Friends
- Be Generous. Find joy in giving. Remember life is
not a zero sum game. By giving, you get to gain even more. By giving,
you open the channel to receive new things in life. When people
experience the beauty of giving, they’d want to give back too, so what
goes around, comes around.
- Share the good things in your life. What are you
happy for? What do you have that others don’t have? What are you proud
of? Don’t keep them to yourself – Share them with others. Happiness
isn’t a zero sum equation.
- Donate. Get in the habit of donating things you
don’t need anymore. For example, old clothes, textbooks, books, toys,
and the like. All my unwanted clothes are always donated to others.
Sometimes I take the nice, unworn pieces and give them to my friends who
can better appreciate them.
- Be Gentle. Our society has brought out a very
“hard” side in all of us – one where we’re abrasive, one where we’re
hard, one where we’re demanding. Bring out the gentle side in you for a
change. It’ll make you a warmer person to be around.
- Be Grateful. For the good things you have, because
not everyone gets to have them. For the bad things you have as well,
because they strengthen your character and make you appreciate
everything so much more. Day 15 of 30DLBLis all about gratitude.
- Write a thank you note to a friend. I think a lot
of times, we take our friends for granted. We forget about what they’ve
done for us and are doing for us, as well as the value of our
connection. Write a thank you letter/note/email to a friend and let
him/her know how much you appreciate him/her. He/she will be very happy
to receive your letter.
- Be Hardworking / Diligent. Without hard work, we
can’t wish to get far in life. I’ve seen people who like to take the
easy way out, and this is not what I promote at PE. There are no “quick
tips” or “hacks” that will give you instantaneous results – at the end,
it boils down to sheer, hard work.
- Be Helpful. Offer your help even if people don’t ask for it. There’s always something you can do for others.
- Be Honest. To lie is to shrink into a lesser self;
To tell the truth would be take a step up in your growth. (Unless
there’s a higher value at stake, such as protecting someone’s
well-being.) One of my values is truth – To discover the truth via
personal experience and constantly challenging what’s around me, and to
be truthful in everything I do and say. I don’t achieve this 100% of the
time, but I do my best to uphold it every moment of the day. Read: How To Deal With Dishonest People
- Be Humble. People who are arrogant tend to suffer
from an inferiority complex, which is why they feel the need to parade
their accomplishments. Learn to be humble. There’s no need to talk about
what you’ve achieved – if they’re really good, the results will speak
for themselves.
- Be Independent. Learn to manage your life. Learn to
tackle your problems by yourself, without imposing on others. Feel free
to approach others if you need help, but you should never expect them
to solve your problems for you.
- Be Individualistic. Always be you – don’t try to be anyone else. Read: Finding Your Inner Self
- Have Integrity. Set your moral and ethical principles and stick to them. Never compromise on them no matter what.
- Be Intuitive. Follow your gut instinct. Let your
intuition guide you. You’ll never go wrong with it. The more you follow
your gut, the stronger your connection with your intuition will be.
- Be a Leader.
A leader is someone who is able to bring the best out of others, who is
able to inspire others to be bigger than who they are, who is able to
energize people into action, who is able to lead a way with a common
vision. Contrary to what many think, leadership doesn’t begin when you
lead a group of people; it begins in our everyday life, with how we
conduct ourselves and how we live our lives. Are you a leader of your
life? Read: You Are the CEO of Your Life
- Be a Listener. The ability to listen is quite
underrated in our society today. Many people are good at talking, but
not listening. For today, make a point to listen to what others around
you are saying. Ask questions. Clarify their answers. You may discover
new things you didn’t know before. If you own a copy of Personal Excellence Book (Volume 2), be sure to check out 13 Tips To Be a Better Listenerarticle on how you can be a better listener.
- Embrace Love. Be a beacon of love. Start by loving
everyone around you. Show love to your friends, family, partner,
colleagues, bosses, clients, teachers, etc – whether explicitly or
implicitly.
- Love unconditionally. The highest form of love is unconditional love, where you love others without expecting anything in return.
- Be Loyal / Faithful. To the people that you care for, to the values that you stand for, to the things that you believe in. In the article Discover Your Values in Personal Excellence Book (Volume 1), I share in detail about values: the importance of values, my values and how you can create your own.
- Be Kind.
- Don’t criticize. It’s easy to pinpoint faults in
others, but really, it’s not in our place to do so. Not only that, it
doesn’t make others feel good about themselves.
- Be Magnanimous. For every thing that people do you wrong, be ready to forgive and forget.
- Accept criticism. If someone offers criticism,
accept it. Accepting isn’t the same as agreeing. You don’t have to agree
with the criticism, but at least give yourself the opportunity to
consider it. Every criticism is an opportunity to improve, to become
better. Read: 8 Helpful Ways To Deal With Critical People
- Ignore malicious attacks. If someone flames you, take the higher route – ignore the person. You can defend yourself on areas where your values
are infringed, but overall, keep a hands-off approach. It’s not worth
it to engage in such discussions, because the flamer will only keep
attacking, with no desire to achieve a resolution.
- Be Meditative. Those who meditate will know that meditation cultivates an inner peace within you. It makes you calmer and connects you with your inner self. Read: 10 Reasons You Should Meditate | How To Meditate in 5 Simple Steps
- Be Merciful. Instead of punishment, think forgiveness. Forceful actions – Pain, suffering, death, etc don’t bring closure to issues.
- Be Moral. Do what’s right over what’s wrong. The
question of “what’s right” can be subjective depending on your
upbringing, but universal values include equality of humans, gender
equality, freedom of speech, freedom of choice, etc.
- Go the non-cruel path. I commit myself to a vegan
lifestyle because I didn’t want to harm animals. While you don’t have to
turn vegetarian/vegan for this purpose, think about how you can follow a
lifestyle that inflicts less pain to other living beings.
- Be Mindful / Present. Don’t live in the past or future, but focus on the present moment. For this is where you’re living at now. Meditating helps you to be present (see #66).
- Be Nurturing. There’s always ability in everyone. How can you nurture it out of each person?
- Recognize the strengths in others. Our society today has eased into a state where we keep looking at what we lack or don’t have, as opposed to what we already have.
The former is a scarcity mindset, while the latter is one of abundance.
Rather than think about what’s missing in someone (be in character
trait, knowledge, ability, etc), focus on his/her strengths. What does she/he have? What is he/she good at? What do you like about him/her? Focus on these vs. what you don’t like.
- Be Open-Minded. Be ready to accept different
beliefs, attitudes, personalities, cultures, practices, rituals,
lifestyles, habits, races, nationalities, diets, etc, for everyone is
different. No one thing is right; it’s just a matter of what works best
for the individual.
- Be Optimistic / Positive. For life is too short to be negative.
- Don’t complain. Complaining generates all this negative energy that makes you no different than an energy vampire.
While it’s okay to vent every once in a while, be conscious of the
times when you do that. Cut down on the time you spend complaining and
think about what you can do about the situation instead.
- Smile. How often do you smile a day? Smiling is
something we don’t do enough. Whether you’re out on the streets or at
work, it’s more common to see people with stoic expressions and hard
frowns than smiles. The next time you see someone, even a stranger,
smile at him/her. You’ll be surprised how many people will return the
smile. Even if they don’t, trust that they have been warmed by your
smile.
- Laugh. As they say, laughter is the best medicine.
Learn to laugh at the jokes people make, at the obstacles you’re facing,
at the mistakes you’re making, and at the mystery that is life.
- Be Organized. The state of your life now reflects
how organized you are. If everything is constantly in a mess, it
suggests you’re probably disorganized in how you manage yourself. In
being organized, you create structure, stability and predictability –
which frees up your resources to pursue new goals. Creating a life handbookwill help to organize your life.
- Be Patient. Do you get edgy when something/someone is late? Time is fluid; it’s a construct
created to help us organize our schedules. Learn to be present and live
in the moment instead. Impatience breeds anxiety; Patience brings
calmness.
- Be Peaceful. Where you have a choice, go for peace
over violence. The latter solves nothing, but creates more pain. The
former is the start to a healing journey.
- Be Persistent. No matter what you do, never give
up. You will achieve whatever you set out to do, as long as you have the
will to do it. My story of how I pursued my passion
and turned it into a successful business is an example of that. The
only time when giving up is the way to go when your priorities change
and you realize the goal you were pursuing isn’t what you want anymore.
Read: Quitting to Win
- Be Prudent. Be bold and daring, but at the same
time exercise caution. A touch of practicality never hurt anyone; it
helps you to be more ready for what’s ahead.
- Be Purposeful. Pursue a cause
that’s higher and larger than you. When you do that, you’ll naturally
grow into someone who’s bigger than who you are today. Pursuing my
purpose to help others grow has made me embark on journeys and make decisions which I wouldn’t have pursued if I was just living my life for myself. Read: Discover Your Life Purpose in 30 Minutes
- Be Reasonable. Know your rights, but don’t overstep your boundaries. Act within good reason – You’ll be the best judge to that.
- Be Repentant. Has there been anything you did that
you’re not too proud of? Repent and process it; don’t leave it inside
your system, because it’s like rotting flesh – it’ll create an invisible
stench and affect you subconsciously in your daily actions. Read: 30BBM Day 24 – Right a Past Wrong
- Be Resilient / Be Strong. Are you facing any obstacles that are making you waver in your goals? You have the strength inside you to do whatever you want – you just have to draw from it. Read: How To Start When You Have Nothing
- Be Respectful. Treat everyone with utmost respect, because every living being deserves that.
- Take Responsibility.
- Live up to your responsibilities. What
responsibilities do you have? Are you living up to all your
responsibilities? Shrinking away from your tasks is an act of avoidance.
Stepping up to them makes you a better person.
- Don’t self-victimize. It’s easy to say “Why me?”
when bad things happen. But it does nothing to build your character – in
fact it makes you weaker over time, because you’re not taking ownership
for your problems. Believe it or not, everyone faces these problems too
– it’s not exclusive to you. Rather than wallow in self-pity, accept
your problems as part and parcel of life and address them. The more
responsible you are, the more control you have over your life. Read: You Always Have A Choice
- Be Self-Loving.
- Be Kind to yourself. Do you often beat yourself up? Stop doing that. You, above all else, deserve kindness and respect from yourself.
- Love yourself. For when you love yourself, you will automatically start loving others too.
- Be Self-Reflective. I make a habit to reflect on
everything that happens to me, because that’s when I can draw learnings
on what I can do better in the future. Self-reflection can take place
via a private journal, an online diary, or conversations with others.
Asking yourself the right questions is paramount in the self-reflection
process. Read: 101 Important Questions To Ask Yourself
- Be Sensitive… to others’ needs and feelings. Always check to make sure you’re not neglecting anyone.
- Don’t Impose. Imposing means to force your opinion
on others. It’s okay to offer your opinion, but if others are not taking
it, then there’s no need to repeat it over and over again. Keep it to
yourself.
- Don’t give unwanted advice. One biggest problems
people face in relationships is when the other party tries to dispense
advice that’s not needed. Many times, people converse as a way of
sharing. Check if the other party is looking for advice first before you
try to offer your 2 cents. It may help prevent unnecessary conflicts.
- Dedicate yourself to Service. It’s said that
service to others is the highest thing one can ever do in life. Think
about how you can contribute to others and to this world. And dedicate
yourself to it.
- Be Sharp. Develop your observation skills. Sharp
people are always the first to catch on to something; because of that
they’re ahead of everyone else in their thinking too.
- Be Sincere / Genuine. Speak from the heart, always.
Don’t say something unless you mean it. One of my core values is
authenticity – I only say things that I mean, and never say things if I
don’t believe in them.
- Be Spontaneous. Be uninhibited! Allow yourself to
act freely, without restrictions. Not everything has to adhere to a plan
all the time. Allow yourself to just go with the flow.
- Be Sympathetic. If others are sharing their
problems with you, be sympathetic. Don’t jab in with insensitive
remarks. Don’t dismiss their feelings and thoughts. Get yourself into
the same state as them and express your sympathy, so they know they’re
not alone in the situation.
- Be Tactful. There’s no need to be rude or abrasive.
Be polite to your fellow humans – everyone has feelings, even if
sometimes it may not seem that way.
- Be a Teacher. You don’t have to be a formal teacher
in name – The very act of sharing knowledge to someone is already
teaching in itself. By teaching others, we become better. What are
things you’re good in? Share the knowledge with other people. Start by
doing it informally, and soon formally teaching others will be
second-nature to you.
- Be Trusting. Always give others the benefit of the
doubt. No matter what you think, the baseline intention of people is
always good. No one deliberately does something to harm others. When
they do, it usually comes from a place of lack, but not out of sheer
malicious intent.
- Be Trustworthy. Always honor your commitments and uphold your promises. If you make an agreement with someone, be sure to stick through to it.
- Be Unattached. For all things are transient in
life. This doesn’t mean you become jaded and an emotionless being. What
this means is you relish in every moment of your life, every situation
you’re in, every person you’re with, as it is, without clinging on to it
when it has passed. For we live in the present, not the past or future.
- Be Understanding. Learn to comprehend things from others’ perspective. A common understanding is needed for relationships to be build on.
- Be Vigilant. While the world is a safe place by and
large, keep a watch out for possible dangers, especially when you’re in
a foreign place. Keep a look out for suspicious people. Stay clear of
potentially dangerous spots. It’s better to be safe than sorry.
- Be Visionary. Set the highest goals
and the biggest dreams you can imagine. Then set off and bring your
vision to life. Be sure to create your vision board too at the same
time. In Day 5 of 30DLBL, you get to create your vision board. I’ve also created a video on Creating Your Vision Board.
The vision board of one of our past 30DLBL participants, Theresa
- Be Vulnerable. Through PE, I’ve learned that
sharing our vulnerabilities is what gives us the greatest strength as
humans. In the past few years, I’ve opened up about some of my deepest
vulnerabilities, including my relationship with my parents, my past heartbreak, my disappointments, among others.
- Be Wise. Being wise means
“having the power of discerning and judging properly as to what is true
or right; possessing discernment, judgment, or discretion”. Practice
good judgment by exposing yourself to different contexts; considering
different perspectives; gathering as much information as you can;
weighing out different possibilities. The more experience you gain, the
more you learn, and the wiser you’ll become.